A New Year and A New Look

This layout, created by me for a Moo Two Designs challenge just felt appropriate for today's blog entry.

This blog is off to a slow start - my own fault. I've been busy working on digital artwork on my other blog, and creating layouts for groups I'm involved in. How others manage to keep up a series of blogs and group activities is beyond me - but I admire you.

Yesterday I revamped TravlynWomyn's Journey and decided that as this blog is a related spin off - though totally different in topic - the two should look somewhat related - down the road even that might change.

Today I redid this one - I see where I have to redo the header - bummer - I used the same parameters, but somewhere I erred - I'll learn!

while building my background, I opted to 'introduce' my family members.

On the left, in the kite, is my eldest daughter - by blood. My adoptive parents basically forced me to give her up for adoption at birth. I was never allowed to see or even hold her - but I could hear her cries down the hall. It was pure hell, alone and totally lost, emotionally.

Lisa found me in 2004. My attempts to find her never got me anywhere. I even wrote to the state of Nevada and gave my permission for her to find me when she came of age - but the information never got into my file.

Lisa didn't only find me - she also found my birth mother - shown with me below Lisa on the day we finally met, face to face - when I was 58.

On the right side are my children, Stephen, Becki and Sarah. Unwittingly, they are the primary reason that this blog is emerging.

On the seat below them is a blank space. Lisa found him too. But he isn't ready to meet me - hopefully some day.

Now that everyone is completely confused - unless you are also adopted, an adoptee - or both - like me, it's time to begin. But not quite yet. I don't mean to be ambiguous, but opening up after growing up and not being allowed to speak at will, it's difficult to put everything into context. But it needs to be done, as I do feel that my story could help others while helping me heal after six decades.

Introduction

Good morning. It's already time to go to work, but I wanted to start this blog rolling, even though it isn't fully set up yet.

There are many great books and sites on adoption, that another blog seemed irrelevant. Instead it's like a person saying, 'I have a dumb question to ask'. There are no dumb questions. What's dumb is NOT to question. It is true that we all face Life in different ways. Our perceptions are unique to each of us. Often, we cannot comprehend how a person does what he or she does, and make excuses and judgments, often born of ignorance.

A blog is simply another person's viewpoint. If the words help bring calm to even one troubled mind, then it has fulfilled it's purpose. My viewpoint may be nothing like yours. That's okay too. Life would be boring if we all felt the same way and saw everything in black or white. it's the shades of gray which ultimately define us.

As both an adoptee AND a birth mother, it's time to share my story - from my personal perceptions. I don't ask for praise or condemnation. This blog will not be in any specific order either - that's the beauty of my own blog. I can be as higgledy piggledy as I choose. My goal is to help others realize that they are truly, not alone.

My life has had extreme highs and extreme lows. It has traveled across the oceans to different countries and different lifestyles. It's my life, as I see it. It's time to write about it, even though it will hurt at times - hurt me that is, in the remembering. Maybe, I too, will finally write myself whole again.

For now, it's time to go to work

TravlynWomyn - July 10, 2009